You are not healing because there is a question you have not answered honestly.
And until you answer it, no amount of prayers, therapy, consultations, will heal you. Instead you will become more exhausted.
This is for the person who believes they have done all the work.
You’ve prayed.
You’ve journaled.
You’ve gone to therapy.
You’ve listened to sermons.
You’ve tried to “let go and let God.”
But you are still wondering “Why am I still here?”
Why am I not completely healed?
In John 5, there is a man who had been sick for thirty-eight years. He is lying by a pool called Bethesda. There was a belief that when the water stirred, the first person to enter would be healed. So people gathered there, waiting. Watching. Competing. Hoping.
Then Jesus sees this man and asks him a question. He said “Do you want to be made well?” — John 5:6
And the man responds:
“Sir, I have no one to put me into the pool when the water is stirred up…”
He explains his situation.
He explains the system.
He explains why it hasn’t worked.
But he never actually answers the question.
Jesus then says: “Rise, take up your bed and walk.” — John 5:8
And the man is healed.
Notice how Jesus asked a direct question, but the man gave an indirect answer.
And that is where many people still are.
We have become very skilled at explaining our condition, our suffering.
Why it started.
Who hurt us.
What we’ve tried.
Why it’s difficult.
And all of that may be true. But explanation is not the same as willingness.
And I’ll tell you this: Healing is not only about what God can do. It is also about what you are ready to release. Because healing changes your life. It removes excuses. It removes certain identities. It removes the familiar patterns you’ve learned to survive with.
And sometimes, without realizing it, people resist that. Not consciously. But structurally.
That man had been in that environment for years. Thirty-eight years. That means:
He had learned the system.
He had adapted to the waiting.
He had built a life around that condition.
Psychologically, this is what is called adaptation to dysfunction.
When something has been present for so long, it stops feeling like a problem. It becomes normal. Even if it is painful.
So when Jesus asks, “Do you want to be well?”, He is not asking an obvious question.
He is asking: Are you ready to live differently? Because if you are healed:
You will have to stand.
You will have to carry your mat.
You will no longer be the man by the pool.
And that requires responsibility.
This is why some people remain in cycles.
Not because they lack prayer. But because the structure of their life still supports the problem.
You cannot heal in an environment that rewards your dysfunction. And you cannot move forward if your identity is built around what you are trying to leave.
So what do you actually do with this? Answer the question Jesus asked. Honestly.
“Do I want to be made well?” And then go deeper: What would I have to release if I were healed?
What would change about my relationships? My routines? My identity? My comfort?
Write it down. Because clarity reveals resistance.
And once you see what healing requires, you can begin to align your life with it intentionally.
About Sandra
Sandra Nkenchor is a faith and mental wellness educator working at the intersection of Christian faith, psychology, and the specific experiences of young professionals and their families. Follow for more teaching.